This past week, Maharat Fruchter did something amazing and inspiring. She wanted to bring some love into a world that seems to be so full of hate so she contacted a refugee social service agency to find out if she could help. Within a few hours, they asked her if she would be willing to host an asylee family (mom and 5 year old daughter from Tanzania). The Maharat agreed and by that night, she had a family, whom she had never met, living in her house.
I had a chance to meet them on Monday night when they came to my house for dinner. My kids played with the 5 year old. I talked to the mom who is a very religious Christian and knew her bible, chapter and verse, a lot better than me!
I have been thinking about what the Maharat did all week. At first, I thought it was because I was so inspired. But then I realized that there was another emotion. I felt guilty. After all, I have a pretty large home. I have a finished basement with a bedroom and I have never thought to invite a refugee family in.
How many times have I read holocaust stories in which a Righteous Gentile risks his or her own safety to saveJjews and protect them through the war. I always ask myself, “If I would have been a non-Jewish Pole during the Shoah, would I have risked my life to save a Jew? Would I invite them into my home?” I know I wouldn’t have been a Nazi or even one of those anti-semitic Poles who once the Nazi’s started the job, kicked the Jews when we were down. But would I have had the courage and concern to save a Jew?” I have always hoped the answer is yes. But now that I see what Maharat Fruchter has done and recognize my inaction, I am actually worried that I would have not been one of the Righteous Gentiles. And therefore I feel guilty.
This feeling of guilt makes me think of all of the excuses.
- I want to help but it is not the right time. I have so many things going on in life and my family to take care of that I cannot possibly do something like this.
- Security. How do I know if I will be safe bringing in a refugee. Maybe the vetting will be insufficient. Will I be putting my family at risk?
- Priorities in Giving - Even if I am able to do this, shouldn’t I reserve all of my chesed and charity for Jews before helping out non-Jews?
So I thought of these excuses as I read about Avraham in this morning’s parshah. The Parshah begins with Avraham at the door of his tent (פתח האהל). Rashi says he was at the door “to see if there are passersby to welcome them into his home.”
Now if it ever was “not the right time” for hospitality, this was it. Avraham was a 99 year old man who just had a circumcision. It was on the third day when according to the text, the pain is the most acute. Yet, Avraham is at the door looking to bring strangers in.
He sees three men. Who were they? They were not three Yiddin (Jews) with payos (sidecurls)! We know they were angels but Avraham thought they were Arab Idolaters (see Rashi verse 4). He brings them in without any vetting and literally no way to protect himself. To appreciate this point, let us consider another Biblical incident that happened on the third day post circumcision. Shechem had kidnapped Dinah. So Dinah’s brothers, Shimon and Levi devise a scheme where all of the people of Shechem are circumcised. Then, on the third day when the people are defenseless they go in and slaughter them.
In our story, Avraham and all of the men of his house have just been circumcised. They are literally defenseless. Yet Avraham brings in these three Arab Idolaters without any vetting or security check.
Now, I am not recommending that you do this at home! I am also not talking about governmental policies but about personal responsibility. I am asking us to challenge ourselves. When we say, “it is not the right time,” was it the “right time” for Avraham? When we say that we want to help but there are security concerns, was Avraham worried about this? When we say we want to help refugees or homeless or any other non-explicitly Jewish cause, but are priorities are to give to Jews first, did Avraham say this?
In our parshah, we have a foil for Avraham. It is not a person but a city - Sodom. G-d wants to destroy Sodom. What did they do that was so terrible?
There is a Mishnah (Avot Chapter 5) that talks about different kinds of people:
- One who says, What is Yours is Mine but what is Mine is still mine. This person is evil.
- One who says, What is Mine is Yours and Yours is yours. This person is pious.
But then there is a third kind of person. This person isn’t pious but isn’t evil. He says, “Look, your stuff is yours but my stuff is mine. I will not steal from you (I am not evil) but I am not going to go out of my way to help you.
He isn’t the Nazi or even the Pole who took advantage of the Jews when they were down, but he also isn’t the Righteous Gentile willing to put himself out. He says, “I don’t like what is happening to the Jews, but this isn't “the right time.” I have to take care of myself and my family. There could also be concerns for my safety. And besides, if I was able to help, I would help a fellow Christian Pole who needs help right now. I am not going to help a Jew.
Well what is this guy like? He isn’t pious but also not evil. What is he?
Two opinions in the Mishna
- He is an average guy
- This is Sodomite Behavior
What?! This is Sodomite behavior. Just because I am not Avraham or a Righteous Gentile, I deserve to be destroyed?
Well I saw an insightful interpretation from Rabbi Moshe Avigdor Amiel. Rabbi Amiel was an Eastern European Rabbi (from Telz and Vilna) who became one of the first to join the Mizrachi (Religious Zionist) Movement. He made Aliyah in 1936 and became the Chief Rabbi of Tel Aviv. He was one of the architects of infusing the new state with Jewish values.
Back to our Mishna. Rabbi Amiel explains that the two opinions are not really arguing. The first opinion, (that someone who says “what is yours is yours and what is mine is mine,” is average) is referring to an individual. Just because he or she is not Avraham, they are not so bad. They are average.
The second opinion, (that classifies that behavior as Sodom) is referring to a society. Individuals might have excuses. It might not be the right time or they might be scared. But a society that has this approach, is evil. It is Sodom.
The Artscroll Chumash has a comment on the sin of Sodom that literally made me jump out of my seat! I hope it doesn’t get removed in the next edition!
“Sodom was a rich and fertile region and, as such, it was a magnet for people seeking to make their fortune...But the Sodomites wanted to maintain their own prosperity and not be encumbered by a flood of poor immigrants….To discourage undesirable newcomers...the Sodomites institutionalized state cruelty, so that it became a crime to feed a starving person…” - - Artscroll Stone Chumash page 81
“Sodom was a rich and fertile region and, as such, it was a magnet for people seeking to make their fortune...But the Sodomites wanted to maintain their own prosperity and not be encumbered by a flood of poor immigrants….To discourage undesirable newcomers...the Sodomites institutionalized state cruelty, so that it became a crime to feed a starving person…” - - Artscroll Stone Chumash page 81
Sodom was evil because they punished their own citizens who wanted to be like Avraham. They were not going to oppress the poor immigrants they just punished those who tried to help them.
Back to Rabbi Amiel - Chief Rabbi of Tel Aviv. He died before the establishment of the State but the values he taught became part of Israel. If there ever was a state who could argue “this isn’t a good time,” (that it has to worry about its own troubles), it would be Israel. If there was ever a state that would be worried about security, it is Israel. Yet, every time there is a humanitarian crisis anywhere in the world,Iisrael is the first to send a rescue mission, set up a field hospital and save lives and deliver babies. These are not simple calculations. After all, there are Israelis back home in need of surgeries and other resources, but these things are being used to save people in Haiti or in Sri Lanka. But Israel is following the model of Avraham. Israel will not become Sodom.
And so, I would like us to use Avraham as a mirror for all of our explanations. Is it really, “not the right time”? Are the risks and security concerns that we express legitimate? (please note, I am not referring to governmental policies but to our individual responsibilities). Finally if we want to prioritize helping Jews over non-Jews, well what are we doing to help out Jews? There are Jewish families who have loved ones at the NIH or other hospitals. They need a place to stay. Have we called up Bikur Cholim to see if we can host someone? Do we volunteer to take people to the hospital?
There are many children (Jewish and non-Jewish) in Montgomery county who do not have a safe home to live in. Have we volunteered to be foster parents?
I know I have done none of these things in my life. My finished basement is empty much of the year. If I would have been a Gentile during the Holocaust would I have brought a Jewish family into my home or would I have used all of those excuses? Now, seeing Maharat Fruchter’s action and my inaction, I think that there is a good chance I would not have brought a Jewish family in. This makes me feel guilty.
But guilt is not always so bad if it spurs us into action.
May G-d bless all of us with the courage to act.